Mastering others is strength, mastering yourself is true power. – Lao-Tzu
As you contemplate the He-Man and She-Ra cartoons of your youth, let’s begin with a bit of etymology.
Merriam-Webster defines power as the “ability to act or produce an effect.” It comes from the Middle English poer meaning “to be able.”
The same source defines “owning” something as having power or mastery over it. It also means to acknowledge to be true, valid, or as claimed.
Ergo, to own your power is to have power over your power. To have mastery over it. And to acknowledge it to be true.
Philosophers, playwrights, and politicians through the ages have been sharing their perspectives on power – its pursuit, abuse, and appreciation.
- Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power. – Seneca
- Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power. – Abraham Lincoln
- The measure of a man is what he does with power – Plato
As leaders, we are asked and often instructed to “own our power.” To master it. To acknowledge it to be true. But how exactly do we do this?
We propose a four-step process. Wipe off your glasses as we take a four-I’s look at owning your power.
Imagine – Visualize what being powerful looks and feels like. Why is visualization our first step? Because we’re getting our brains to work for us. Visualization creates neural pathways in the brain that act as a “blueprint” to be followed in the actual performance. You strengthen the pathways from visualization when you do what you imagined – the stronger the imagining, the stronger those pathways are for you to follow. Athletes visualize their successful games. Actors visualize their successful role-playing. Speakers visualize their successful presentations.
Ask yourself:
- What does it feel like to be powerful?
- With whom are you radiating your power?
- What are you accomplishing?
- What’s the reaction?
Identify – What type of power works best in the situation you imagined? You get to CHOOSE – and choice is empowering.
Ask yourself:
- Do you have skills or knowledge others need? (expert or informational power)
- Does your position have authority? (legitimate power)
- Can you influence because others respect, like, and want to engage with you? (referent power)
Initiate: Take the first step. Once you do, you’ve changed the situation. Shifted the energy. Leaving your head (what you’ve imagined) for the external world may feel scary, vulnerable, or uncertain. And it’s this fear of what may happen, the fear of what’s next, that often holds us back from acting, from taking that step. Remember – thanks to your visualization you’ve already imagined the step and the outcome – your brain has created the map. You’re just following it.
Ask yourself:
- What’s one thing I can do to make that first step?
- Who can help me do it?
- How will I reward myself when I’ve done it?
Integrate: Bring your experience with power back inside you. Combine recent experiences with others to form new neural connections. Through integration you are building your power toolbox as you learn from it. Consider debriefing your experience with friends and colleagues to hone your ability to own this power in the future. And most importantly, celebrate your success. You owned your power. However it turned out, even if it wasn’t quite the visualized success, you took a critical step toward a larger, more fulfilling life.
Ask yourself:
- How was this similar or different from other experiences with power?
- What did I learn?
- Was reality even better than imagined?
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Those who seek power are not worthy of that power. – Plato
By owning your power, you’re not seeking something that doesn’t belong to you. You’re claiming what’s already yours. Acknowledging it to be true and valid. Mastering it for to serve your higher purposes.
By the power of Grayskull indeed.
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Local to LA? Want a deeper dive into mastering your power? Join us Wednesday, August 8th, at General Assembly in Santa Monica, for an in-person discussion about power in the workplace. Benefit from the wisdom of the collective and deepen your ability to identify, own, and manage power.
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Tina is CEO of WorkJoy. Our team of workplace love coaches is committed to empowering humans to love what they do and equipping leaders and organizations with the tools, practices, and processes to encourage and support this love.
